Janet Murray

How I discovered my ADHD superpower

I was recently diagnosed with ADHD.

At the grand old age of 45.

If you haven’t heard of it before, that stands of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) - a disorder that affects the functioning of the brain and includes symptoms such as inattentiveness, hyperactivity and impulsiveness.

I’ve found it uncharacteristically difficult to talk/write about, but I’m sharing it here in the hope it might be of help (even just as a reminder that everyone has their ‘things’ to deal with).

In this special podcast episode, I share the story of how I discovered I had ADHD and why I believe it's my secret superpower as an entrepreneur.

{Click on the player above to listen to the podcast episode and/or read on for a detailed overview. Scroll down to the bottom to read the show notes including all the links mentioned in this episode}

By the time you get to the end of this post, there’s a good chance you’ll be thinking one of three things (or maybe all three).

  1. But I do those things too
  2. But you don’t seem the slightest bit ‘hyperactive’ Janet
  3. ADHD isn’t real...it’s just your personality type

So, to put it into context...yes we all do some of the things I share with you here sometimes. What makes the difference with ADHD is (a) the frequency with which the symptoms occur (b) the extent to which it affects your life.

It’s also worth mentioning that ADHD shows up differently in different people….particularly in girls and women (which is why it’s often missed). For example, the hyperactivity and/or restlessness can be mental rather than physical (as in my case).

And while educational/professional achievement in people with ADHD is often lower, it can show up in high achievers too. In fact the ability to 'hyperfocus' - to zone in on a particular area of interest and block out everything else - can be EXACTLY the thing that helps you to become a high achiever (another reason why ADHD can get missed).

I always felt there was something a bit ‘different’ about how my brain worked - but like many people - I associated ADHD with hyperactive teenage boys, so never imagined I could have it.

Then I stumbled across an article about women and ADHD and thought…’oh my God, that’s ME.’ I spent the next year or so reading and researching, which is what, eventually, led to me getting tested and getting a diagnosis.

My ADHD symptoms

To put my symptoms into context, here are some of the questions I’ve grappled with pretty much all of my life:

✔️ How can I be such a high achiever at things I find interesting but suck SO badly at those I don’t (which is VERY apparent from my school reports)?

✔️ Why can I concentrate for hours on things I’m interested in - to the point where I lose track of time - but struggle to pay attention to anything that doesn’t?

✔️ Why am I so bad at ‘life stuff?’ Paying bills, booking/cancelling appointments, ordering groceries, cooking….

✔️ Why do I get so excited about new things….then struggle to finish them?

✔️ Why am I so bad at friendship? Remembering friends' birthdays, sending baby gifts, asking after them when they’re sick, turning up to social things…well maybe not bad, just inconsistent...

✔️ Why am I such an impulsive spender (but never seem to learn from my mistakes)?

✔️ Why am I so brilliant with words...but frequently get muddled up with numbers and dates?

✔️ Why do I leave everything until the last minute? In fact, why does leaving it to the last minute sometimes feel like the ONLY way to get it done?

✔️ Why do I struggle so much with detail? To the point where starting a project with lots of moving parts or instructions to read feels PHYSICALLY painful?

✔️ Why can’t I hold down a job or even stick working in an office with other people for more than a few weeks at a time?

✔️ Why do I get so BORED of everything so quickly: meetings, relationships, social events, small talk, projects...?

✔️ Why do I sometimes make such impulsive decisions? Decisions that can blow up relationships (friendship/work/family)...often on a whim?

✔️ Why am I SO damn sensitive? To the point where a cross word/brush off from a colleague/friend can put me in a dark place for weeks on end…

✔️ Why am I a compulsive workaholic who works longer hours than anyone else I know (often to achieve the same results)?

✔️ Why don’t I enjoy holidays/days off like other people seem to?

✔️ Why can’t I SWITCH MY DAMN BRAIN OFF?

All of which I now realise are symptoms of ADHD.

Why you don't have to be hyperactive to have ADHD

If you’ve worked with me and/or are a friend, you may be surprised by me sharing this.

Because I probably come across as pretty calm, right?

I generally don’t pace the floor, interrupt people when they’re speaking and/or talk incessantly (well, only sometimes ) or any of the other stereotypical symptoms of ADHD.

The only thing you might have noticed is that sometimes I talk a bit fast. And - if you’ve worked with me, you’ll also know I THINK fast. Which can make it hard to keep up at times...

But I wasn’t bouncing off the walls as a child/teenager (and nor do I do that now). So I had no reason to believe - and nor did anyone else in my life - that the things I describe above were anything more than personality quirks.

Relationships is the area where I struggle most. While I LOVE people, I find navigating the unwritten rules of friendship - and particularly female friendship groups - nigh on impossible.

Maintaining female friendships often involves doing things you don’t want to do - or that bore you - just to be accepted. Which I’ve learned doesn’t work for the ADHD brain.

I’ve been dropped from numerous female friendship groups over the years for not playing by the ‘rules’ (or at least it feels like I have - but that might be down to Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria, which comes hand in hand with ADHD, but I’ll save that for another post!).

Which means life can feel a bit lonely at times.

While I have tons of acquaintances, I only have a handful of really close friends. Generally driven, ambitious women like me. Or men. Because both are unlikely to get offended when I forget to message them back, say/do the wrong thing or disappear for a few months because I’m engrossed in work or a new hobby. Because that’s all I can manage without messing things up.

Until recently, I saw my inability to maintain deep and long-lasting friendships with women as a character flaw. In fact, I’ve spent countless hours pouring my heart out to my mum about it over the years. Now I realise this is probably down to having a different kind of brain... which kind of helps a bit.

Coping Strategies

Work-wise, I’ve completely leant into my zone of genius (writing, communicating, creating content) and outsourced the things I find hard. And I love what I do, which means I rarely have problems paying attention to work stuff.

Life wise...I kind of bumble along, trying - and often failing - to create systems to keep me organised. But I still get far too many fines/charges for forgetting to pay things. I’m still impulsive with money, but because I earn more these days, it’s less of a problem. Which means I no longer have any debt. Although, if my income changed, I know that’s something I’d have to watch out for.

I’ve learned that the ADHD brain only has two modes: ‘now’ or ‘not now’ - which means you can’t draw on a previous experience like most people do (for example, getting charged for going over your overdraft limit because you bought something you couldn’t afford). Which is why you keep repeating the same mistakes - over and over again - much to the frustration of family/friends/colleagues.

Relationships are the area where I struggle most. While I LOVE people, I find navigating the unwritten rules of friendship - and particularly female friendship groups - nigh on impossible.

Maintaining female friendships often involves doing things you don’t want to do - or that bore you - just to be accepted. Which I’ve learned doesn’t work for the ADHD brain.

I’ve been dropped from numerous female friendship groups over the years for not playing by the ‘rules’ (or at least it feels like I have - but that might be down to Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria, which comes hand in hand with ADHD, but I’ll save that for another post!).

Which means life can feel a bit lonely at times.

While I have tons of acquaintances, I only have a handful of really close friends. Generally driven, ambitious women like me. Or men. Because both are unlikely to get offended when I forget to message them back, say/do the wrong thing or disappear for a few months because I’m engrossed in work or a new hobby. Because that’s all I can manage without messing things up.

Until recently, I saw my inability to maintain deep and long-lasting friendships with women as a character flaw. In fact, I’ve spent countless hours pouring my heart out to my mum about it over the years. Now I realise this is probably down to having a different kind of brain, which kind of helps a bit.

Next steps

This is all quite new to me, so I’ll leave it here (and I’m also a bit bored now).

I’m just starting out on this journey, so I still have a lot to learn. I spent the first few weeks wondering whether the test was ‘wrong’ and worrying about whether people would think I was jumping on to some kind of trend/bandwagon (ADHD is really common in entrepreneurs).

Once I’ve got my head around it, I’m sure it’s a topic I will revisit again - especially once I’ve explored different treatment options. But I wanted to share this with you in case it was helpful in any way.

And it goes without saying that while living with a restless, racing mind isn’t always easy (in fact, it can feel unbearable at times), it is almost certainly responsible for some of the things I’ve achieved in my life/business.

Over and out.

Podcast Shownotes

  • Why I recorded this bonus podcast episode (1:35)
  • My ADHD symptoms that led to my ADHD diagnosis (5:49)
  • Why I always just accepted my symptoms as personality quirks (9:15)
  • How ADHD has affected my ability to form close friendships (11:01)
  • Why ADHD symptoms show up later in women (12:24)
  • How I struggled at primary school with sensitivity (14:01)
  • How I lost interest in certain subjects at school (18:08)
  • How I started enjoying school when I could focus on the subjects I was good at (20:43)
  • Why I found university boring and it didn’t do much for me (22:50)
  • Why I struggle with small talk especially at events (23:59)
  • How I couldn’t stop spending money when I was younger (25:54)
  • When I realised that teaching wasn’t right for me (28:50)
  • Why freelance journalism was a really good fit for me (30:48)
  • How I got interested in entrepreneurship and online businesses (34:02)
  • How I struggled with being a mum and making connections with other mums (36:12)
  • How ADHD leads to hyper-focus and can make you lose interest in things (39:53)
  • Why I decided to find out if I had ADHD /  I started to question why I couldn’t enjoy time off (40:22)
  • Why it’s about the frequency of symptoms in an ADHD diagnosis (42:18)
  • How I’ve managed my business around my symptoms (43:05)
  • How ADHD hyper-focus has really helped my business (45:16)
  • Resources to understand more about ADHD (47:10)

Resources

Tracy Otsuka Podcast 

Jessica Macabe How to ADHD 

A Radical Guide for Women with ADHD 

Taking Charge of Adult ADHD 

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Janetmurray.co.uk/podcastfinder

Join my Build Your Online Audience Programme and get access to my NEW Pinterest course 

Other podcast episodes

[217] How to find your entrepreneurial superpower with Osmaan Sharif (podcast)
[406] Mindset problems that can slow your audience growth with Osmaan Sharif (podcast)

Connect with me on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook and LinkedIn

[411] How to become the number one choice in your industry with Jen Hall

Would you love to be the market leader in your industry - the go-to specialist? If so, you'll love this podcast episode with business coach, best-selling author and host of the Expert Unrivalled Podcast Jen Hall.

Whether you have a product or service-based business Jen explains the three things you must-do if you want to become a market leader.

Discover why you must ditch 'niche fear' and why not niching could be the biggest mistake you make in your business. Jen explains why differentiation and messaging are key and why you must nail your USP.

Find out why size and fame don't matter if you want to become a market leader in your industry. And how you can stand out in a crowded market - even if can't think of any new ideas.

PLUS why becoming a market leader is the BEST thing you can do for your business and your bottom line.

{Click on the player above to listen to the podcast episode and/or read on for a detailed overview. Scroll down to the bottom to read the show notes including all the links mentioned in this episode}

Podcast Shownotes

  • About my Pinterest course (0:50)
  • About Jen Hall and her business and how she helps people (4:11)
  • The benefits of becoming a market leader in your area (6:44)
  • Why size doesn’t matter if you want to be a market leader (8:45)
  • Why you need to niche before you can become a market leader (10:18)
  • Why you need to ditch niche fear (12:12)
  • Why passion will help you niche (14:20)
  • Why you’ll never get anywhere if you don’t niche (15:06)
  • How to use your messaging and articulate what you do to help you niche (17:43)
  • Why you should avoid overcomplicating your messaging (20:44)
  • Why you’ll hold your business back if you don’t specialise (22:19)
  • Why differentiation is key to becoming a number one choice (25:02)
  • Why you need to create your USP rather than look for it (30:05)
  • Why you need to look at your competition to help innovate  (33:06)
  • The difference accumulated benefits and that one killer thing you do (34:25)
  • Why you need to bring your ideas to market (37:14)
  • How to differentiate yourself in a crowded market (38:53)
  • How to stand out by using technology to be personal (41:04)
  • Why you need to be personal to your audience become a market leader (43:02)
  • Why content planning is so much easier if you’ve specialised (43:43)
  • Why your messaging will help you become a market leader (45:45)

Resources

Jen Hall The Expert Unrivalled Podcast

Sign up for my Daily Email

Janetmurray.co.uk/podcastfinder

Join my Build Your Online Audience Programme and get access to my NEW Pinterest course 

Other podcast episodes

[349] How to find the right niche for your business (podcast)
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[409] How to use Pinterest to grow your online audience with Kate Beavis (podcast)
[Bonus] How to generate income fast by creating a power hour for your business (podcast)

Connect with me on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook and LinkedIn

[410] How to avoid unconscious bias in your marketing with Ramat Tejani

If you've been wondering how you can promote inclusion and diversity in your business, a good place to start is with your marketing materials.

And in this fascinating interview, marketing expert and confidence coach Ramat Tejani explains how to spot unconscious bias in your marketing and gives practical guidance on how you can be more inclusive in your content.

Find out which aspects of your marketing you should focus on - from your website to your marketing materials to the tone of voice you use in your emails. PLUS the different ways you can promote diversity in your content - for example, through the guests you feature on your blog, podcast and Facebook Live shows.

Ramat also recommends resources that you might find helpful on inclusion, diversity and anti-racism.

{Click on the player above to listen to the podcast episode and/or read on for a detailed overview. Scroll down to the bottom to read the show notes including all the links mentioned in this episode}

Podcast Shownotes

  • About Ramat and her business (1:43)
  • How unconscious bias works in our minds (3:13)
  • Why we can be uninclusive in our marketing (4:17)
  • Why we all have an unconscious bias (7:18)
  • How to view your business for diversity, inclusivity and unconscious bias (10:54)
  • Why being inclusive in your marketing will make a difference to your sales (14:47)
  • Why you should keep your language and tone of voice clear and simple (17:30)
  • Why you should be conscious of the audience you're writing for (20:08)
  • Why anyone should be able to understand your content  (25:25)
  • How to be less bias in your content creation and bring in new voices (26:55)
  • Why you need to keep adapting your marketing to ensure inclusivity (31:18)
  • Why you will have to take your time with any changes you make (35:17)
  • Why it’s ok to say you’re taking the time to learn about racism (41:17)
  • How everyone can make a difference even if its small (44:08)
  • Books and resources that Ramat recommends (45:50)

Resources

It's about Damn Time Arlan Hamilton

Sway: Unravelling Unconscious Bias Dr Pragya Agarwal

The Other Box

Ramat Tejani Website

Ramat Tejani Instagram - The Inspiration Box

Ramat Tejani Instagram

Ramat Tejani Twitter

 

Sign up for my Daily Email

Join my Instagram Academy Course here

Janetmurray.co.uk/podcastfinder

Join my Build Your Online Audience Programme

Other podcast episodes

Join my Build Your Online Audience Programme

Other relevant podcast episodes

[343] The three audiences you must build to create a successful online business (podcast)
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[384] How to be more yourself in your social media content with Nat Lue (podcast)
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[391] How to write better social media captions (podcast)

Connect with me on Twitter, InstagramPinterest, Facebook and LinkedIn

[409] How to use Pinterest to grow your online audience with Kate Beavis

Want to learn how to use Pinterest to grow your online audience? 

If so, you need to listen to this podcast episode with Pinterest expert Kate Beavis.

Kate explains why Pinterest is a visual search engine - and not a social media platform - which makes it a powerful tool to build your online audience. 

She shares expert tips for setting up your Pinterest boards, what kind of content you should be sharing - and how often - and how to make use of the latest Pinterest features.

Kate also explains why Pinterest isn't just for product-based businesses and why it's ideal for service-based businesses too.

PLUS how you can create tons of content fast and what you need to understand before you start creating content for Pinterest. 

There's so much value in this podcast episode. Even if you're already using Pinterest in your business I guarantee you'll find something useful.

{Click on the player above to listen to the podcast episode and/or read on for a detailed overview. Scroll down to the bottom to read the show notes including all the links mentioned in this episode}

Podcast shownotes

  • About my new Getting Started with Pinterest Course with Kate Beavis in my Build your Audience Programme (1:02)
  • About Kate’s business and how she uses Pinterest in her business (2:50)
  • What Pinterest is and why it's not a social media platform (4:05)
  • How to use Pinterest as a visual search engine and how it compares to Google (5:29)
  • Why you need to understand your audiences pain points when planning your content (9:23)
  • Why Pinterest is great for a product-based business (9:57)
  • Why Pinterest is really powerful for a service-based business (11:30)
  • How to set up Pinterest for your business and why keywords are vital  (16:08)
  • How to set up your Pinterest boards and how many boards you need (18:01)
  • Why scheduling is key on Pinterest and how often you should be pinning (21:50)
  • How to share other people content on Pinterest (23:30)
  • What to consider when it comes to visuals/text/images on Pinterest (27:18)
  • How to make sales if you are a product-based business on Pinterest (30:07)
  • How to quickly create lots of content for your Pinterest boards (32:01)
  • Where to push your content if you don’t have a blog or website (34:34)
  • Using Pinterest Stories and tips on linking your videos to TikTok   (36:14)
  • How to use Pinterest to promote your podcast or YouTube channel (38:30)
  • What metrics are important to track on Pinterest (39:28)

Go to my  Pinterest here

Kate's website The Indie Practice

TheIndiePractice Pinterest
TheIndiePractice Facebook

Resources

Join my Instagram Success Academy here

Janetmurray.co.uk/podcastfinder

Join my Build Your Online Audience Programme

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[319] Why you should be using Pinterest in 2019 with Eve Tokens (podcast)
[372] How to build an engaged online audience (podcast)
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Connect with me on Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, Facebook and LinkedIn

[408] 11 Instagram Story Ideas that will help you make more sales in your business

Do you ever have those days when you feel like you're all out of ideas for Instagram Stories? Or you've been posting Instagram Stories but you feel like your ideas are a bit stale and you'd love to shake them up a bit?

Maybe you've got a new launch coming up and you’d love to know some new innovative ways to talk about what it is that you do and promote your product or service?

Then listen to this podcast episode where I share 11 Instagram Story ideas to generate more sales in your business. With three of them I go into more depth and explain how you can construct the entire Instagram Story from beginning to end.

Discover how you can use Instagram Stories to start conversations and generate sales. Plus why getting people into your DM’s is key.

I’d love to know what you think.

{Click on the player above to listen to the podcast episode and/or read on for a detailed overview. Scroll down to the bottom to read the show notes including all the links mentioned in this episode}

Podcast shownotes

  • Why Instagram stories are so powerful for sales conversations (2:42)
  • The difference between your Instagram grid and your Instagram Story (3:22)
  • Why asking for opinions/using polls on Instagram stories is great for making sales (08:21)
  • How to use your publicity shots in Stories and use voting polls (10:46)
  • How to create content about your behind-the-scenes on Instagram Stories (11:33)
  • How to use  behind-the-scenes on Instagram Stories for product or service businesses (12:15)
  • Examples of using before and after content in Instagram Stories (14:29)
  • How to use the grenade post as a video in Instagram Stories  (16:44)
  • How to use awareness days in your Instagram Stories (18:13)
  • The ideal length for an Instagram Story and how to keep people viewing & engaged (19:30)
  • How to ask for opinions to generate loads of engagement (20:46)
  • How to construct a day in the life Instagram story and examples of what to post (24:10)
  • How to avoid frustrating your Instagram story viewer (26:57)
  • What to put in a getting to know you Instagram Story and what you must include (27:21)
  • How to create an Instagram Story to promote and get people in your DM’s (29:52)
  • Why you should get people to DM you rather than send them to your website (32:58)
  • About my Instagram Success Academy (34:25)

Resources

Download my 27 Instagram Story Ideas here

Join my Instagram Success Academy here

Janetmurray.co.uk/podcastfinder

Join my Build Your Online Audience Programme

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[362] How to grow your Instagram following to 27K fast (podcast)
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[385] How to sell on Instagram Stories (without feeling sleazy) (podcast)
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Masterclass - How to generate passive income in your business

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How to write social media posts that sell (online masterclass)

Content Planning Masterclass

Join the Media Diary Owners Club 

How to add closed captions to your video using Rev and Kapwing

#2021Sorted Buy your ticket 

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Buy my book Your press release is breaking my heart

Rev.com*

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Social Media Engagement Playbook

Instagram Engagement Playbook

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[407] How to turn boring topics into engaging content

Do you ever have a series of social media posts or marketing emails to write and find yourself wondering how you heck you can make the topic interesting? 

In this podcast episode, I share my secret strategy for turning 'boring' topics into super engaging content. 

It’s so simple, you’ll wonder why you didn’t think of it yourself. 

{Click on the player above to listen to the podcast episode and/or read on for a detailed overview. Scroll down to the bottom to read the show notes including all the links mentioned in this episode}

Podcast Shownotes

  • About this podcast episode (1:20)
  • About my Build Your Online Audience Programme (1:38)
  • About my story strategy to make a boring topic interesting  (7:30)
  • Why stories are so important when writing social media posts (7:52)
  • How to start thinking about your post and the message you want to share (9:00)
  • Examples of how to make boring topics interesting with stories (10:42)
  • Why you need to think about a central emotion in your story (13:02)
  • How to start your story with impact and drama (14:30)
  • Why relatable stories are important to bring your story to life (16:32)
  • How to use a story to make a sales deadline exciting (18:10)
  • Why your message doesn’t have to be exciting but the story does (19:59)
  • The four-part process you can use to write any social media post (22:19)
  • Example of how to structure your social media post (26:09)
  • How my four-part process will help organise your thoughts (27:40)
  • What to do if you don’t think you have any stories or ideas (28:10)
  • How to create a story bank of topics that you can use (28:44)
  • Some question prompts that will help you think of a story (28:52)
  • How sharing vulnerable stories will help you make stronger connections (30:18)

Resources

Sign up for my Daily Email

Join my Instagram Academy Course here

Janetmurray.co.uk/podcastfinder

Join my Build Your Online Audience Programme

Other podcast episodes

[374] How to create a year's worth of content in one morning (podcast)
[390] How to stop overthinking your content (podcast)
[391] How to write better social media captions (podcast)
[398] What sort of content should you create during a global crisis (podcast)
[405] The secret to creating bingeworthy content (podcast)

Masterclass - How to generate passive income in your business

Masterclass - How to plan sell and launch an online Webinar or Masterclass for your business 

Masterclass - How to turn your in-person services into online offerings

How to create an editorial calendar for your business (blog post)

How to write social media posts that sell (online masterclass)

Join the Media Diary Owners Club 

Order your 2020 Media Diary here

Join my Build Your Audience Programme

How to add closed captions to your video using Rev and Kapwing

#2021Sorted Buy your ticket 

How to create a high-converting lead magnet course

Buy my book Your press release is breaking my heart

Rev.com*

Kapwing

Social Media Video Engagement Playbook

Social Media Engagement Playbook

Instagram Engagement Playbook

LinkedIn Content Strategy Playbook